By Serene Tan

Not long after my dad passed away in 2011, the government announced plans for an 8 lane highway that would cut through Bukit Brown,  and graves in the way would have to be exhumed.

The news of the highway triggered a memory. The last time I visited my grandpa’s tomb was more than 40 years ago when I was a young girl.  I could vividly recall my grandpa’s tomb at Bukit Brown.  Concerned it might be affected, I realised it was time to visit him.

I arranged with my cousin to visit the grave for the  ‘Qing Ming’ festival the next year, 2012.  It was a relief to learn that his grave was not staked for exhumation. But to my dismay, the tomb was in a dilapidated condition.  The tomb had been neglected for more than 15 years after my dad suffered a massive stroke which left him paralyzed and wheel chair bound.

Grandpa’s tomb (photo Serene Tan)

It dawned on me then, that I now had the responsibility to carry on my father’s  duty to ‘sweep’ grandpa’s tomb  during the ‘Qing Ming’ festival.  His tombstone spoke to my roots.

Inscribed on the tombstone was my ancestral hometown , Kimen,  my grandfather’s death date, 1937,  and the names of his children. My father was the only son.  For the first time I came to know my father’s birth name 陈天吉, Tan Tien Kiat,  inscribed on the tomb.  My grandpa passed away when my dad was only five and dad changed to a simpler  name, 陈 亞 旺, Tan Ah Ong

I arranged with a contractor to renovate my grandpa’s tomb, and before work started, I decided it was also time to visit my ancestral home in Kinmen, Taiwan . Unconsciously, I think I was seeking the blessings of my father and grandfather.
My grandpa Tan Teow Meng （陈 朝 明 ）left his home in Kinmen, more than 100 years ago. In Singapore,  I was told he worked as a lorry driver and died because of a bout of high fever.

My father had attempted to visit his ancestral home, thrice in the 80s.   Kinmen  is a small archipelago of islands and at that time was under a military administration because of fighting with China.  The only  means  of transport then was by military helicopter.  Visitors to the island were  restricted but because Dad could claim to be descended from his ancestors in  Kinmen, getting permission was not the problem.  Each time, it was  bad weather which prevented my father’s flight on the helicopter from  taking off  from mainland Taiwan.

He was so close and yet so far. I felt deeply the pain of his disappointment.  Dad subsequently passed away, without fulfilling his dream.

It was in  my ancestral village of Houshan  (后山), now known as Bishan, that  I learned my father had contributed funds to two temples.  His name was inscribed on the list of donors for both temples. This one is from the smaller village temple  陈氏宗祠

I placed my father’s photo as close  as I could to  the inscription of his name among  the temple’s donor list (photo Serene Tan)

My heart swelled with pride. There is an old Chinese saying “Drink Water, But Remember the Source”-   “饮水思源” .  My father, although he was not able to visit his ancestral home, never forgot his roots.

The family home and land in Kinmen, remains abandoned.  But at home in Singapore, my grandpa’s tomb has been rebuilt with  granite stone and fresh inscriptions in gold dust.  My grandpa had a humble life  his son – my father – worked hard and became a successful business man and never forgot his father.  I have always admired my father for his work ethic and persistence.

Grandpa’s new home (photo Serene Tan)

Who we are and from whence we came  ( photo by Serene Tan)

So as I marked Qing Ming at my grandpa’s new  “home” after my visit to Kinmen, I felt happy and blessed to have been able to accomplish my father’s dream of visiting our ancestral home.

Qing Ming at Grandpa’s tomb, 2013 (photo Serene Tan)

***

My journey to my ancestral home in Kinmen in a photo essay.

Map of Kinmen, showing Bishan at top right hand  (photo Serene Tan)

My ancestral home and land, abandoned.  Relatives I met told me, the home was occupied by troops during the conflict with China and they also dismantled the wooden structures to build their bunkers.  ( photo Serene Tan)

The village temple  陈氏宗祠

The village temple nearby which my father donated funds to (photo Serene Tan)

The temple serves residents  nearby to offer prayers anytime as and when they deem necessary. (陈氏宗祠）

A view of the interior of the village temple (photo Serene Tan)

My father also donated to the larger Tan clan ancestral temple, 陈氏 家廟.  Unlike the village temple, it’s  opened only for certain festival celebrations  and entry restricted to only  male descendants. I was privileged  to be granted permission to enter, as an exception.

In the courtyard of the Tan temple, holding a photo of my father  (photo Serene Tan)

Entrance to the Tan temple (photo Serene Tan)

Offering my respects at the Tan temple (photo Serene Tan)

My father’s name 亜 旺 on the donors list.

4th from left is my father’s name  on the list of donors from Singapore to the Tan temple (photo Serene Tan)

Meeting my relatives for the first time, I learned my great grandfather’s name is 陈 正.   So he is the earliest of my ancestors I have come to know.

Meeting relatives ( photo Serene Tan)

Meeting relatives (photo Serene Tan)

I will be marking my father’s third death anniversary at the Singapore Buddhist Lodge, 17-19 Kim Yam Road on 23 Feb 2014 at 10 am. Friends and relatives are welcome to join us in prayers.